Why the men in leadership cannot connect to issues that are important to women
30 Jul 2015 - {{hitsCtrl.values.hits}}
Note to all of us – whether we like it or not, men are still in the driving seat when it comes to leadership. This is a fact and a fact we must take note. Gender agendas don’t really work there not because men in leadership positions don’t want to – most can be sincere enough to want to change. But put in simple terms – they don’t know. When it comes to gender territory some men, especially those in CEO positions, may not truly know why and how the dots connect. And it isn’t their fault.
Most men heading companies don’t have an idea of what is important in a woman’s day-to-day life; not many have working wives at that kind of seniority. Unless out of choice and especially if she is in her own right, a woman who has achieved success, wives of CEOs typically don’t go to work. They are likely to have help at home and help with children and housework. They don’t sit around a table figuring out how to make ends meet; not to make it sound elitist but they don’t have to do that. All of which does not give their husbands under whose leadership many women work, the opportunity to learn on how gender issues matter at home and also at work place.
To be fair to the men, what they don’t understand, they are not likely to comprehend. Of course, they can relate to the big picture – of maternity and child care but the finer picture, the small details that still do matter in the big picture for the millions of women who go out to work everyday, maybe out of their scope.
They have to tow a fine line too – in order to be politically correct, gender issues must be addressed. There are single mothers who need to take time off to go for parent-teacher meetings. Women who are care givers to ageing parents and who must therefore attend to those needs. Doctor appointments and school calendars. When the domestic help goes home, most women yearn for an extra hour to get the house work done before going to work.
When term tests come around, children like to wait around for the mother to come home for that last minute coaching; it doesn’t help when you have meetings going well into sunset on such days. And who can understand? Who can comprehend that on such days, you long for an early exit from the office and wish that the man in charge could and would understand.
It would go a long way if the men in senior positions can take the time to understand how the day of the average career woman actually works. The time needed to take off with sick children, the work that can be done from home, toning down schedules when faced with a domestic crisis – these issues are key to how efficient anyone, whether a man or a woman, will perform at work.
Work from home
Technology today allows many talented men and women to work from home – some global companies actively encourage that. A woman who is capable and talented, who is able to give 100 percent of herself to her career, will only be able to do so when her mind is at rest concerning her home. If she has worries about children or the home front, chances are that she is unable to give of herself totally as she should. A wise CEO would be able to have his ear to the ground; even if he may never come across such issues at home, he could always learn from the women who work for him.
It is also up to the women themselves to create the kind of dialogue at work that would help the men understand. Instead of finding fault with CEOs and men in leadership positions who may not budge on gender issues, it would help if they could be involved in an open dialogue that would encourage a healthy discussion on managing gender issues.
Most women value their careers and want to excel at what they do – they may find that they are not able to give their very best until and unless space is given for them to manage the domestic front in a sensible manner. For women themselves, it is a transition – children will not always be small and chores don’t take forever. As long as you can find a healthy balance between the two, you can always reach for the stars.
Women at work also need to understand that men’s brains are wired differently; not all of them, even with the best of intentions, can relate to the issues facing women. They do not get the fine emotional lines and are best kept informed. If the dialogue can be worked right, enabling men to understand the issues that are important to women who work, it will go a long way in heightening the importance of gender equality at work.
(Nayomini Weerasooriya, a senior journalist, writer and a PR professional, can be contacted at [email protected])
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