Healing the divide, one conversation at a time

Those forming the head table and present at the book discussion held at the Diocesan Chambers, Cathedral of Christ the Living Saviour, on December 12 from left: Gihan de Chickera, Moderator Dr. Mahendran Thiruvarangan, Manikya Kodithuwakku, Suramya Hettiarachchi and Bishop Duleep de Chickera – (Pix by Upul Abayasekara)

Even 15 years later, the Sri Lankan civil war has several narratives and that depends on who you are speaking with.

After becoming the Bishop of Colombo in 2001, and well after the war ended in 2009, Bishop Duleep de Chickera and his wife, Geetha, made several visits to the war-affected areas of the country to give spiritual guidance to people, whose lives were shattered.

De Chickera penned his experiences in a book titled ‘Beyond Checkpoints (2023)’, which won a state literary award this year. Across the pages, De Chickera narrates his calm, searching conversations with people from all sides in the backdrop of a brutal war; Army, LTTE, Tamil civilians, and Colombo elites included. Educator and storyteller Suramya Hettiarachchi, Senior Lecturer at the University of Jaffna Dr. Mahendran Thiruvarangan, Bishop Duleep de Chickera, and his son Gihan took part in a renewed discussion of the book at the Diocesan Chambers, Cathedral of Christ the Living Saviour, on December 12.

To begin with, Hettiarachchi offered a harrowing account of the night the war ended: “When the war ended in May 2009, I was working at the Army Headquarters. When the news broke that night, there was a resounding cheer that went on. Hardened soldiers were crying and hugging each other. I cannot quite explain what it was like to be at that particular point at the Army Headquarters. They were rejoicing because none of their colleagues were ever going to die again. They were rejoicing because no one was going to be wounded again, and they were rejoicing because no one would go missing again, and that they would not miss out on their children. So there was a lot for them to rejoice.”

“And here I was. I went to a quiet corner and cried and cried and cried, because I had this overwhelming feeling of loss, about Sri Lanka’s human potential, especially in that last battle where innocence was fleeing. I did not know the individual stories; all I could hear were shouts and the meeting of hearts and agony, and I cried”- Suramya Hettiarachchi   Educator and storyteller

She continued: “And here I was. I went to a quiet corner and cried and cried and cried, because I had this overwhelming feeling of loss, about Sri Lanka’s human potential, especially in that last battle where innocence was fleeing. I did not know the individual stories; all I could hear were shouts and the meeting of hearts and agony, and I cried. No one could understand this. No one could understand the feelings that I carried with me.”

The reason for Hettiarachchi’s anguish was because this war had made the act of killing so mundane. She read from the book: “Counting the deaths becomes like scoring runs at cricket. Never mind if every run steals a life. Never mind if it breaks the hearts of mothers, spouses, and children forever. Never mind if it is our neighbor that is eliminated, and never mind if the rules are broken. The simple rationale to the game is that the other side has to die for yours to live. If you get this right, clapping and cheering is allowed.”

Under such an end to the war, a theme that was repeated throughout the evening was that “in order to learn, we must first unlearn.” 

Dr. Thiruvarangan, who had met de Chickera when he was just a schoolboy in Jaffna, spoke of the cruelty of the LTTE. The expulsion of Muslims from the North, the conscription of child soldiers, and the suppression of dissenting voices from within the Tamil community. Activists from the south tend to romanticise the struggle, he said, but he appreciated how forthright de Chickera’s portrayal of the LTTE was.

The second point that was raised was the lack of history being taught in schools. “July 1983 is nowhere in our history syllabus,” said de Chickera, and cited an example of his daughter addressing this issue at an international school where she taught.

Gihan, a literature teacher, spoke about the ability of literature to inform and change hearts. He described his experience of teaching Yasmine Gooneratne’s poem ‘Big match 83’ in his grade eight class. “I have to start with a bit of context about what happened in our contemporary history, and then, of course, we go on to painting this very powerful poem by one of our foremost poets. It’s very interesting that after the lesson is done, a lot of conversation happens in the class with the students. They speak to each other and they go through the questions for discussion, there’s a lot of inquiry,” said Gihan.

The message was that holding these conversations is the key to reconciliation. Speaking to the Daily Mirror, Dr. Thiruvarangan described reconciliation as “a long and difficult, arduous process that doesn’t happen overnight.” He said there is no one truth as such, but rather there are multiple stories of violence. “So, being accountable, recognizing the pain that the other went through, and the system that produced that pain, and trying to rectify that system is very important for reconciliation,” he said.

Reading de Chickera’s book amounts to learning how to listen; entering a conversation seeking to learn, not trying to impose your views on that person. Of course, the book was not only about physical checkpoints, but also about the psychological checkpoints people have about people different from them, and how to overcome that divide.

In addition to bookshops, the book is also available for sale at the reception of the Bishop’s Baudhaloka Mawatha office for 1000 (Books can be purchased during office hours on weekdays).