Charitable fundraising, charitable organizations, charitable individuals along with charitable chatelaines are but a few in the vast and ever increasing firmament of ‘givers’ we see all around town. How wonderful I say with absolute respect and undulating applause. It is when the giving benefits the givers more than the getters that the respect dissipates and derision takes its place!

There are no set rules, regulations or rationale that tells anyone how, who when where or what is or is not charitable. We have all seen that giving anyone in need is always a good thing, and that ‘helping’ is considered a cornerstone of most teachings no matter where in the world we are. Helping should be in line though with those who need the help, and not a roundabout pathway to helping oneself. As always before the salacious slander starts spewing, let me say that I am not by any means more charitable than the next person, and am neither affiliated nor in any way promoting any particular charitable methodology. I am simply an observer to the openly and sometimes blatant schemes and dire deceptions we plainly see.

When thinking or even hearing of charitable anything, the epitome and personification is the sainted Mother Theresa, who through her globally lauded work of unflinching dedication became not just a symbol but an unprecedented bastion of giving with no ulterior motive. Now neither You nor I are delusional enough to consider ourselves even on the same path, but having such exemplary individuals to look up to, shouldn’t we be able to do what we do quietly without expectations? Can we ‘give’ and not worry about the ‘get?’

In the social whirl of the social twirls where I am absolutely and happily excluded, the sometimes deliciously devious doyennes who are self proclaimed alphas of their salivating pack, set the low standards for every ‘act’ of every theatrical part of their lives. As I have mentioned before it is these social moths whose aspirations to be butterflies fell short, that dictate the very existence of their fellow followers. They mistakenly and usually comically decide the ‘trends’ for entertaining, from what needs to be served to who, and by whom, to even more disastrously deciding on the style ‘trends’ that their pack have to follow. It must be wonderfully rewarding for these dictators to be able to dictate in some area, because their own personal lives are usually completely and devastatingly devoid of any meaning. Imaginary power in some area is better than facing the reality that they have no power at all.

These are the very same dictators who direct the strangely elaborate the somewhat sad spectacles that fall within the perimeters of ‘charity’. The planning and plotting put the strategic maneuvering required by Hannibal to cross the Alps, to shame! The charity has to be the right one, the date, time and place aligned with social and celestial scheduling, while the participants are deftly chosen for their photogenic and pandering qualities rather than their need for giving. The garb needs to be sufficiently grand because all hell would break loose if one did not look the part when playing the part! Coordinated clothes and carefully chosen jewelry are de rigueur in order to look sufficiently fleshy and flashy while seemingly swathed in benevolence. Necklines need to plunge and derrières dressed to impress while still resembling decency. 
These thinly veiled attempts to enact their own brand of charitable giving, means that their strategy to get is way more than that to give. ‘Getting’ in these instances, for these ‘duplicitous givers’, can take the form of social media self promotion, to blatantly pandering for accolades and awards in order to gain some back pats and pat backs that would lead to more socially dubious doors opening. 

These ‘charitable coquettes’ base their ‘biased brand’ of giving on their getting, and ‘getting’ they certainly do! Many a religious observance is based on ‘acts of charity’, where the acting could put these ‘givers’ as the front runners to receiving a ‘razzy award’ for the most ‘over (badly) acted’ role in a cinematic-circumstances! Feigning piety while looking for the best camera angles, they have to ensure that every miniscule act is captured by their own personal coterie of paid camera clickers. We also see the ‘charitable acts’ targeting the ‘less privileged’ making sure that the most privileged get the maximum publicity as rewards for their minimum efforts. Providing meals whether to children, the elderly, or people in their own neighborhoods, to giving medical equipment to the differently abled, or organizing a festive sing-a-long for those needing their spirits uplifted, every single moment must always be captured and documented like the distinct and unmistakable steps needed to successfully launch astronauts into space. The ‘countdown’ to the charitable ‘event’ also is an escapade of group messages and agendas, clothing coordination, and hair salon appointments that best showcase the ‘givers’ in their disturbingly delusional light.

When the actual thousands of images are collated the ‘best’ make it to social media where the ‘givers’ are sated in knowing that the publicity received would keep them basking in their own fake glows, until the next ‘act of giving.’ Hilarious as these endeavors are, from the viewpoint of entertainment value, they can rank quite high, in giving many around town a few ‘laugh-fests.’ 

There are many people though who are involved in charitable giving, with absolutely no thought for personal propaganda of any kind. From donating entire hospice facilities, to helping or completely funding care homes, from working tirelessly towards protecting the environment, to ensuring a better life for animals, these ‘quintessentially quiet’ folks, would absolutely cringe in horror at the thought of massive photo shoots and smiling for a headline grabbing image. As I said before, in charitable instances there are no rules and regulations as to how or what is right or wrong. We do know though that basic decency applies to everything in life. Why make the desperate plight of any being the vehicle for one’s own ego massaging masquerade? Why stand flashing one’s exquisite dental work while ‘giving’, just to make a media feed? Do give what you can, and do so often, generously, and most of all ‘selflessly.’ Because when you see that your ‘acts of kindness and giving’ have made a difference, brought happiness, and made someone’s existence better, that is, or should be, fulfilling reward enough.